Um, Blog? Where did you go?  ¶ 7/19/2002 11:29:00 AM

  The Friday Five:

1. Where were you born? Roanoke Memorial Hospital in Roanoke, VA.

2. If you still live there, where would you rather move to? If you don't live there, do you want to move back? Why or why not? I never really did live there, except for (I think) the first few months after I was born. My Mom's from Roanoke, and she went home to be with her own mother for my birth (I was the first baby). My Dad was in a band and was constantly on the road, so they didn't really "live" anywhere- they stayed with my grandparents when they weren't staying in hotel rooms. Since my Grandparents live there (and my Mom moved back about 5 years ago), I've been there several times. I'm pretty comfortable in saying that I will never, ever move there. It's not a horrible place, but the worldview doesn't exactly fit in with mine. I don't think I could stand it.

3. Where in the world do you feel the safest? It's not so much places that make me feel safe as people. Ryan, immediate family members (My Mom, Dad, other Dad, and 2 sisters), my close friends. It really doesn't matter where I am if I've got emotional support.

4. Do you feel you are well-traveled? I don't know. Logically, in comparison to a lot of other people, I suppose I am. I've been to several states in the US, I've hit most of the major destination cities, and I've been to Europe. On the other hand, I don't feel well travelled. The world is a big place, and there are so many places I want to go that I haven't been.

5. Where is the most interesting place you've been? Oh, jeez. I don't know. Everywhere is interesting to me. Maybe Inverness, just because I was in awe the entire time I was there. It was odd- I pretty much felt like I was right at home. Safe, if you will. :) It was glorious. But I don't know if that's the same thing as interesting.   ¶ 7/19/2002 09:36:00 AM

  "Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born."
- Anais Nin
  ¶ 7/17/2002 04:59:00 PM

  I had really, really weird dreams last night. Like, for example, there was this scary beekeeper, who was Elvis. And lots of bees (duh). They weren't exactly after me, but it was very scary, for reasons I don't remember. And then there was this other dream about this moron boy that I've been playing phone tag with at work, and the Student Information System was down again, and I had to travel to SIS-Land to fix it. Apparently, SIS-Land was something somewhat akin to the Super Mario Brothers games. But, I had to drive an ungodly long distance to get there, and my friend Liz was driving behind me (never got explained why SHE was going to SIS-Land), and I was almost there when this asshole cut me off and sent me skidding off onto the shoulder, which dropped off into this river. I stopped in the nick of time, but when I tried to pull back onto the highway, there was all this traffic. And Liz was gone.

I woke up somewhere in here. The next round of sleep produced something of a continuation of the same dream, but this time I was with my little sisters, sitting on the bank of some river (different river, though, I think), and Liz came up and asked if I'd made it in. I said, "No," and she told me all about it, and said she was very glad scary asshole dude didn't send me into the river. And I don't remember the rest.

So there you go. Weird Ass Dreams. I haven't had strange dreams like that in a while (which is odd, because I'm known for my strange dreams), so the only thing I can chalk it up to is Turkey Burgers. Don't usually eat them, so maybe...? Either that, or it was just my due.   ¶ 7/17/2002 11:08:00 AM

  Writing fiction after .. 2? 3? 4? years of NOT writing fiction is an interesting experience. I feel mostly relieved. All this fear and pressure built up- what do I write about? Do I still want to write? What if I'm not as good as I used to be? What if I was never any good and I just deluded myself? And I haven't. Going to see Neil in November helped quite a bit. Listening to him, talking to him, made me realize that I still wanted to write. It's one of the reasons I started the blog. To get used to the idea of sitting down and writing about something again. But it isn't the same to ramble about my life as it is to Make Things Up. If the writing here is bad, then it doesn't matter. Whatever I'm saying still happened, or it's still my thought, and that in itself (witness the ego) is enough to make it worthwhile. Fiction, on the other hand, by its very nature relies on clever storytelling to make it come to life. And the big question has been, "Am I clever enough to pull it off?"

And now. I did it. I broke the barrier. I wrote. It's not the best thing I've ever written. It isn't the worst. And it IS clever. And I feel ... free. Like it's ok. I CAN TOO still write.

It isn't even a complete story. It's just a scene, really. In a story that Alicia and I are writing together. But it's my scene, and I wrote it.

*BIG HAPPY SIGH OF CONTENTMENT*  ¶ 7/16/2002 11:50:00 AM

  There is no getting the stench of Feta Cheese off of your fingers, short of simply letting it move on of its own accord. I have a tendancy to lean forward at my desk and rest my chin in my hands, which I keep doing, only to jump back in revulsion. This has and will not, however, stop me from continuing to eat feta cheese.

I found out the other night that Alicia had never played any of the Tekken games. I am truly horrified. I also have all these fresh veggies my boss left with me- some butter beans, squash, and tomatoes. It needs to be eaten, and Ryan won't touch it, so I thought I'd cook veggies and have her over for dinner and Tekken playing. Only when I went to Blockbuster.... they haven't got ANY of them. Not Tag, not 3, not even 2. Convinced I was blind and stupid, I went up to the counter and asked after them. They really haven't got them. What the hell kind of video game selection can you proclaim to have if you haven't got a single Tekken? (ACK- Hand again. PEEEWWW.)

And then I went home all disappointed, only to find my house at around 86 degrees. Talk about ass. I washed the air filter out a bit- hopefully that will make do until I can get out to Walmart. And I had pasta salad with some of the squash and tomatoes (and stinky feta, dammit) in, and that made up for it a little bit.

This afternoon I'll try another video store for Tekken... Alicia or no, I'm suddenly having massive lust for playing it. I kick ass as Hwoaroang or however-the-heck-you-spell-it.... what can I say? I got a thing for little red-headed thug boys.   ¶ 7/15/2002 01:39:00 PM

  I need a new air filter
'ere I do become
a puddle with a large bill  ¶ 7/15/2002 01:17:00 PM

  After getting over the joy of not having anything to do for the weekend, I realized that I was bored. So of course, I went to Memphis. Alicia came with, and we had girly shopping and I bought things for Ryan. I also did get some shorts and two new tops- no jean skirt though. That, alas, will have to wait until a later date.

And once again, I missed doing the Weekly Round-Up on time. I sort of... forgot about it. Deal.

  ¶ 7/15/2002 10:44:00 AM