I love my dog, but sometimes I want to strangle him. I do plan on having children someday, and I often think that this whole dog thing is a good warm-up for it.

For my birthday, Alicia gave me a pocket shrine. It's actually an altoids tin. She painted it black. She made color copies of various pages of the Sandman, and there are painstakingly chosen pictures and quotations put on. It has rhinestones and glitter, and two little tea-light candles inside. Not only does it look cool as hell, but it's very personal. It meant a lot to me that she took the time to create something that was so perfectly ... well, me.

I came home from work today (yeah, I know its Saturday - stupid recruiting event) to find it on the floor in my bedroom with great big teeth marks in it. It's all bent out of shape.

It was on my dresser, for chrissakes. Towards the back, even. Next to my jewelry boxes and a few pictures (which it has never occured to Puck to gnaw on). When I saw it on the ground, I started to cry. Why this thing? Of all the random objects on my dresser, why did he have to pick the one very thing that is utterly and completely irreplaceable? Why? It still opens and closes, but, um... teeth marks. Can't get those out, you know?

I'm partly mad. Mostly I'm sad. I have to tell Alicia, "Hey, you know that really awesome, amazing birthday present that you put all that time and thought into making me? Yeah, my DOG ate it." That's not cool, you know. I think the worst thing is that I take it personally. According to dog logic, chewing on my pocket shrine is no worse in the scale of Bad Things Doggies Do than pulling an empty soda bottle out of the trash and playing with it. And yet it hurts my feelings that he chewed that as opposed to something else. I know that's stupid. But I can't help it. It just plain makes me upset. There isn't even anything I can do, since I didn't catch him in the act. Sure, I can wave it in his face and say "NO!" But that's not much, and it's not much consilation.   ¶ 1/25/2003 02:02:00 PM

  And... now it is Friday!

Had about zillion things I was going to write about today. Like this cartoon in the DM, which really pissed me off. I think it should be fairly obvious why. I also wanted to go off on Autozone, to whom I plan to write an angry letter. I'll have to pass on the story later, though, because today has really been kicking me in the backside.

Why is it that other people have nice, relaxing, minimal work Friday afternoons, and I always end up busting my butt? All week, I'm just sort of piddling about - do a little work, surf the net. Do a little more, surf the net. Friday afternoon comes, and BAM! Why can't people tell me about this stuff on Monday?  ¶ 1/24/2003 05:18:00 PM

  I just totally tricked myself into thinking it was Friday. Bummer.

New in the Chronicles of My Whack-Assed Dog - Last night, he ate an entire rolled out batch of raw pizza dough. For thick crust, too. Amy gave Ryan and I one of those Turbo Cooker domed thingies, and you can cook an entire pizza in it in 8 minutes. While pizza #1 was cooking, I thought I'd dash into the office to talk to the boy, smoke a cigarette - something. I'd been working on the second batch of dough, and I remember looking at the timer. About two minutes left. When it dinged, I came back into the kitchen. Looked at the cutting board, which was suddenly lacking in content.

Two minutes, and not a sound. No mess, either. I'd have expected at least a healthy dusting of flour on the kitchen floor. Puck is goood.

Ryan and I kept feeling Puck's tummy for bloating. Ryan was afraid he'd get massive gas, and I was afraid that the dough was still rising in his tummy. Yes, I know. I'm a paranoid doggie-mom. Puck's eaten plenty of horrendous things he wasn't supposed to and come through just fine.   ¶ 1/23/2003 12:40:00 PM

  It's almost time to cash in the rest of the day and commit my ass to the couch for some football.

Hoping really hard for an Eagles - Titans superbowl, so that Ryan and I can tear eachothers throats out next weekend. Good luck to both McQuarterbacks today!

Update: I hate football.   ¶ 1/19/2003 01:55:00 PM

  My distate for cleaning out the litter box ranks second only to putting away laundry. I don't know why I hate putting away clothes so much, but I think the litter thing is pretty self-explanatory. I make it as easy as possible on myself by using the disposable cat pan liners- like mini garbage bags. It only takes about 3 minutes to completely change it, and still I have to sit and work myself up to it with mucho cigarrettes and mental pep-talks, as though its the worst thing in the world.

The post birthday dinner was fun. I had shrimp-stuffed peppers with linguine. And parmesan soup. And chocolate chip creme brulee for dessert. Oh, yes, it was delicious. I had a bit of a shocker when Courtney and Nate decided they were going to pick up the tab. It wasn't exactly the cheapest meal I've ever had (Not to mention Alicia's and Ryan's meal, too - and they had the steak!) I love my friends, they are fabulous. But my poor cracker roots are still protesting about it. It's silly, because if I could afford to, I'd be the first person to grab the tab and insist to be the one to pay for it. I'll get them back, though. It'll just have to be on an individual basis. :)   ¶ 1/19/2003 12:11:00 PM